Blog Archives

Broken Bones and Silver Linings

Famous last words:

“Okay, last run and then I’m off to get some dumplings and catch the bus.”

I was talking to my riding pal Lilly, we were stood at the top of the terrain park at Welli Hilli Park,

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Drugs Busted After the 2006 World Cup. Sort of…

“Sir,” she said in a suddenly stern voice, “your bag’s tested positive for amphetamines.”

My jaw hit the floor. My bag? Amphetamines? You what?

I was standing in the customs area of Christchurch Airport, the entire contents of my bags laid out before me on the cold metal counter,

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A Week of Fruit Picking and Verbal Abuse in Bundaberg

“Stop chatting to your girlfriend and get back to work, you Pommie cunt!”

The speaker was my supervisor, and we were in a Queensland tomato field pruning vines. My ‘girlfriend’ was my male coworker who, being a white Australian, couldn’t really be subject to the usual racial or national insults so was instead a ‘blooming pufter’

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Sailing in the Whitsunday Islands: 3 days of vomit and misery

I looked along the deck at the picture of youthful beauty alongside me, all the long tanned legs and all the long blond hair fluttering in the breeze, and I looked out at all the beauty around us, all these magnificent tropical islands with their perfect white sand beaches;

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Hostel Horror Stories: the Melbourne Bag Pisser

Spend any significant length of time backpacking, and you’ll hear plenty of hostel horror stories. Eventually, you’ll directly experience or witness your very own! I’ve had a few, but one of my hostel horror stories stands out head and shoulders above the rest: the Melbourne bag pisser…


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